Guess what! Guess what! I figured out… How to do something illegal, actually. Hm. Should I be bragging about this on here?
Maybe not so much. But it’s pretty exciting.
I figured out how to download movies! Wo! It’s the best thing since sliced bread. Which? Actually wasn’t that big a revelation, because initially it being sliced actually made it go stale faster. It wasn’t until later when the packaging and preservatives were perfected that it became a huge hit.
So, technically, this is the best thing since bread packaging, and preservation methods were developed to a modern level, and the production of sliced bread became financially viable.
And while we’re on finance? It’s not like I was stealing from some retailer here… The only things I downloaded were some movies that I came across in the ‘gay and lesbian’ section at the local bohemian video store a few years ago.
The video store in question is the only one I’ve found so far with a section like it – the others don’t really seem to stock non-mainstream/ controversial LGBT movies. But the existence of a dedicated shelf for gay and lesbian movies (well labeled, and separated from all the other shelves) kind of made me question why we needed to separate ‘their’ movies from ‘our’ movies.
It’s not like I’m going to come across a Rom-Com featuring a lesbian couple in my regular ‘straight people’ section and be disgusted. Or worse. Converted.
So. Back on topic. I downloaded a couple that I really like – and totally would have paid for – because I couldn’t find anywhere in New Zealand that would sell them to me!! I know, because I looked!
His name is John Paul Pitoc, and he spends a truly heroic amount of screen-time shirtless. He works as a Go-Go dancer in a seedy gay bar, so he also does a fair bit of shirtless – pantsless – dancing. And dudes? May I just say: Phwoor.
Much to my disapointment, he hasn’t really been in anything of note since this. (If I’m wrong – and I sincerely hope I am, because this man’s shirtless torso has great talent – please feel free to correct me.)
I’m also going to have to find a copy of Transamerica (Felicity Huffman is heartbreaking and dry, and funny as hell in this), and Hedwig and the Angry Inch, which I’ve been told is amazing (- but have yet to see, because, again it’s totally inaccessible through all my other more legal ventures!)
Oh. And also I had to find a copy of A Weekend at Bernies for one infatuated flatmate. I figured that was ok, though, because she has a genuine love for it, and it’s practically a million years old – ancient, almost. They’re pretty much giving it away.
Wait. It was produces in 1989. Which actually makes it younger than me. I’m going to go ahead and take back that thing about it being ancient.
In fact? A Weekend at Bernies is practically a spring chicken next to movies like Breakfast at Tiffanies, Sabrina, and Casablanca. (Which, if you’ve seen them lately, are still looking like the elegant old ladies they are.)