Nightmares and restless sleep

The sugar cravings aren’t so bad today, and I’m rediscovering garlic. It smells terrible, but I love the flavor with tuna, spinach, tomato, and cous cous. Also? I’m distracting myself for hours at a time playing on this calorie and activity tracking website. Unfortunately it doesn’t have any of the brands I use here in NZ. I wonder if there’s a website like it based here?? I should google that.

I did not sleep very well last night. First I kept waking up every couple of hours to stare at the clock. (No, brain. It is not 8am yet. It is, in fact 2am. We’re not getting up.)

Second, last night I blocked a kick with my shin, or someone blocked MY kick with their shin (I’m a little unclear about exactly what happened) and the result was intense pain. Intense roll on the floor and cry pain. Only, naturally I didn’t roll on the floor and cry, because: ew. Also? I’m a total badass like that.

Anyway, the pain didn’t even really set in until after I’d stopped moving while I was on my way home. By the time I got to bed my shin felt like it had curled up, reached around, and sunk it’s teeth into my calf muscle in order to quiet it’s shrieks of pain.

It was not conducive to a good nights rest.

Third, I get really vivid dreams at the moment, and most of the time they’re not nice vivid dreams. Last night I woke up after the worlds worst road trip, where I managed to fight with people who didn’t want me there, and cause huge permanent rifts with family members and friends. I woke up with that awful sinking feeling you get when you’ve done something you can’t ever undo, and it’s going to cause major damage.

I hate fighting with people in real life. Tension kind of gets me all riled up and jumpy – so naturally I HATE doing in my dreams. Unfortunately I don’t seem to get a choice. Most nights my dreams are stressful situations, awful things, guilty feelings, awful tension, doom and gloom, panic, and horror.

Thankfully my waking life is a whole bunch nicer than my dreams these days, byt still: Dreams like this are not a pleasant way to great the day.

Sometimes the voices in my dreams yell so loud I jolt awake, and check that my flatties aren’t standing outside my room trying to get my attention.

What do you dream about?


4 thoughts on “Nightmares and restless sleep

  1. Oh, you’re going to be sorry you asked that. I have the most whacked out dreams EVER. I occasionally have horrifying nightmares where someone is hit by a car outside my house and they die in front of me while waiting for the ambulance. I wake up crying from those. And the other night I had a nightmare about zombies.

    But mostly my dreams are just bizarre. Like the one where it was my wedding day, but I didn’t know who the groom was and then my cousin got eaten by a giant clam. Or the one where a friend had lost a hand in an accident and wanted help choosing the most life-like prosthetic. Or the one where I was made to join the navy because I’d answered “yes” to the question that said “Do you like boats?” on a kids quiz on a Qantas flight when I was seven. Yeah. I don’t even TRY and make sense of them. It’s dark and scary in my brain!! 😉

  2. Now that I’ve given up on sleep meds, at least for the moment… I’m finding that I am a pretty vivid dreamer, too. Some good, some bad, some just plain weird… but ALL leave me waking up feeling like that stuff truly just happened. It’s a bizarre feeling, especially when it seems like a long dream. You know the kind where SO much happened that you feel like you must have been asleep for days? And then I look at the clock & realize it’s only been an hour & a half or so since the LAST time I looked at the clock. Because that’s how my sleep patterns roll…one hour at a time, take half an hour or so to get back to sleep, then another hour of sleep. Lather, rinse, repeat.

    It’s only a matter of time before it all catches up with me & I re-addict myself to my bestie, Ambien CR.

  3. i hardly EVER remember my dreams, but when i do they tend to be WEIRD. like, i’m engaged to Ray Charles even though he’s so much older than me (and technically dead in real life) but he’s such a brilliant musician i don’t mind, but then it turns out we’re getting married on stage as like a 5 minute bit of some huge elaborate stage act, and so eventually i called it off because i didn’t want my wedding to be in the middle of a stage show.

  4. Ugh, I hate those dreams. Sometimes, after I wake up, I have to remind myself that it was a dream, and that the awful outcome that happened in the dream didn’t really happen in real life. No fun, that. Hopefully, for you, they’re just a temporary indicator of stress and will go away shortly. Out of curiosity: are you able to lucid dream?

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