So as we all know, I cut off the majority of my hair the other day. When the hairdresser snipped off my entire ponytail, and waved it around like some gruesome war trophy… Well that’s when I started to get worried. Then later in the afternoon, sitting at my desk when I dared to touch the back of my neck for the first time, only to find it bare… Well that was kind of scary too. I spent the entire day with a stiff neck, trying to keep my head as still as possible, so as not to feel the lack of hair moving over my back and neck.
The thing is, I don’t hate my new hair. In fact, I love it. I loved it from the moment the hairdresser chopped off 20 centimetres of it and shook it at me like a pompom. I’m just not very good at embracing change. It takes a while for it to sink in.
So now that the idea of change has absorbed and taken root, I’ve embraced my short choppy angled bob… And… Well, I feel like a different person.
Removing that much weight just hanging from your head – that has some pretty significant symbolic meaning.
My hair used to pool around my shoulders, wrap round my neck, and twist and tangle itself into knots and snarls.
It was forever in my face, my eyes, my mouth, molting all over my clothes, my furniture, my life.
Now that it’s gone I feel lighter inside of myself.
I once saw a book titled ‘The Unbearable Lightness of Being’ to this day I have no idea what that book is about, but I do know that if I was going to write a poem about the feeling I got running my fingers through my newly cropped hair… Well, I’d want to call it the Lightness of Being. There’s no unbearable about it. This is a release, and it feels great.
I feel confident, and whimsical, and quirky. I’m the Short Hair Girl, and I like the feeling.
It’s doing good things, practically for me too – I haven’t been late to work once since I had it done.
The only time I had real reservations was five minutes before my first TKD class with new hair. I pretty abruptly realised that I actually don’t really have enough hair to tie back anymore. After a few moments of consideration, I managed to pin enough of it back, so that I looked like I was taking the class seriously. I like the fact that I can’t scrape it back into a pony-tail anymore though. It makes me feel more like myself, being able to wear it out while I’m working out. Its like another symbolic release for me – there’s no need to hide my personality, just because I’m wearing a uniform. I can still be Short Hair Girl at the gym, at work, or at TKD.
And the feedback. Wow, if you guys are ever in the mood for some serious ego stroking, then make a dramatic cut to your hair. I’ve had people telling me that my long hair was always beautiful, and they were totally jealous of it, but short hair? This cut? It does amazing things for my face, and for my cheekbones, and it just suits me down to a tee. And the number of people asking who my hairdresser is, and saying that they’d like to try something similar because mine looks so awesome? Please excuse me, because I think my ego just grew another three stories high…
So in short (geddit? Short?) This haircut is probably one of the best decisions I’ve made this year. And it’s totally all about how I look, and how I perceive myself because of how I look, and how OTHER people perceive me… Which traditionally is kind of a shallow thing to place so much weight on, but dudes? I really don’t care. I feel amazing, I look amazing, and my hair takes half an hour less to dry every morning.
My therapist would be right here telling me to take a moment to own it, and brag about it, because everyone deserves to do a little constructive bragging.
What are you bragging about today?