Did you ever have one of those days where you’re all out of sorts for no apparent reason? No? Well I’m having one right now. And it’s kind of sucky. For no apparent reason.
I mean, I should legitimately be over the moon. I got a pirate hat today. In fact? I’m wearing it right now. In bed. It is awesome. I also got my blue belt. I’m not wearing that in bed, because that would be weird, But it’s sitting right here on my bedspread, all the better for me to admire it. Along with the new belt is an awesome new pattern that I kind of love. It’s very low and slinky, and sharp. I like it a lot.
I also busted up my hand tonight because I got partnered with a dude that kicks like a freight train. I’m extremely envious. I have a really hard time kicking hard, because it hurts my feet and ankles, because don’t think I have the right attacking tools and enough ankle strength. Also enough flexibility. Or perhaps he can kick so hard, because he’s actually 1/8th train. That would explain a lot.
I wonder if I’m all out of sorts because I’m being all self-defeatist again? I mean, I’m already half convinced that I’m never going to be able to do any of the stuff a blue belt is supposed to do, and I haven’t even given any of it a try. It’s hard for me not being perfect at things immediately. I hate the feeling of looking like a giant dork in front of people.
Also, I got invited out to dinner tonight, and had to turn it down, which sucks. I didn’t want to admit that I’m on a massively restrictive budget, and a diet, and I’m just too tired tonight to be going out and socializing, so instead I made up a lame excuse about needing to come home and work. Then I found out that they’re celebrating the fact that the newlyweds are about to have a baby! Ah! Awesome! But still. Budget restrictions meant I had to stick to my lame-o ‘work’ story, and now I feel bad, because I really wanted to do the excited girly squealing thing with the pregnant lady because she’s totally cute and PREGNANT! (Just cause I don’t want babies myself doesn’t mean I can’t be excited for people who do. So there.)
Also I went up to say congrats to the guy and I was all ‘ah! what is the protocol here? I feel weird about hugging people I’m not related to, or extremely comfortable with, so that was out. Shaking hands seemed to be a bit to formal (and masculine?) so I settled on two thumbs up and a cheesy grin. Is that weird? Thumbs-upping a pregnancy announcement? I’m not sure. I hope not…
Also? Wisdom. Teeth. Enough said, right? Only, because it’s me, and I’m nothing if not an accomplished whiner, I’m going to go ahead and elaborate. My wisdom teeth are pushing through on my top row of teeth, and OH. MY. GOD. The pain. The dull, aching, irritating PAIN. I’ve been chewing painkillers like candy today. And that’s about all I’ve been chewing, because it feels like sticking glass into my mouth every time I eat. Lunch-times bagel was particularly painful, but I pushed through, because I am a trooper. (And addicted to bagels.)
And I’m all grumpy now. Even though I have a pirate hat, and a blue belt, and am well on my way to getting my ass out of debt (and into a cute new car.) I think I need sleep.