Arachnophobes? This isn’t the post for you.

So this morning I wander into my bathroom and flick on the light, and see the shadow of something moving against the wall. I ignore it, because the window was open, and I figured it was just wind. Then I turn on the shower, and oh holy god. THIS is darting around in the corner of my bathroom:

Naturally I responded with a massive leap back to the safety of the lounge area – which later made me wonder why the heck I have so much trouble with flying kicks. I mean, it turns out I can quite comfortably jump backwards 2.5 metres, surely going forward and doing a kick at the same time would be simple, right?

Shannon: Oh god. Alright Batz time to earn your keep.


Shannon: Well go on. It’s moving around and being all skittery. You love hunting. You spend hours chasing moths, and slaters, and mosquitos.


Shannon: Well someone’s going to have to turn the shower off at least. I’m on tank water.


Yeah. So the cat wasn’t much help. It turns out living alone means taking care of your own spiders. It took me quarter of an hour but I managed to drum up the girl-balls to trap it. (I didn’t leave the shower running that whole time. I’m not stupid.)

Shannon: So I’ve decided to trap it under a glass.


Shannon: It’s not exactly a decisive course of action, but at this point I think we need to withdraw and strategize for a more permanent solution.


Shannon: this partnership isn’t really fulfilling my needs right now Batz, just so you know.

Batz: Meerow?

Yeah. So without the help of the cat, I managed to trap the thing. And now it’s sitting on my kitchen counter at home. I don’t know whether to hope it’s magically disappeared by the time I get home after TKD tonight, or to hope it’s still there.

In other news buying spider repellent has moved right up at the top of my list. Although for something this big, I’m not sure if spider repellent will do the job. Perhaps a security system to stop home invasion? I know one thing for damn sure: I’m going to stop sleeping with the windows open above my bed.



6 thoughts on “Arachnophobes? This isn’t the post for you.

  1. This is by far the scariest post I ever read (you did warn me in the title). I would have died, yes died, if I were in your position. Once I had to stop myself from shooting a spider with the gun I kept in the house. I was too afraid to get close enough to kill it so I aimed a gun at it till I came to my senses and killed it with a baseball bat, screaming the whole time.

  2. Oh Dear Lord that thing is HUGE! I think I would have died, or hoped that Roxy is more useful than Batz.You’re braver than me. I always make sure I have a big can of fly spray, and get the inside and outside sprayed regularly, and run one of those Robocan things inside. I. Hate. Bugs.

  3. Always look on the bright side. Put a saddle on it and you’ve got a ride into work each day.

  4. I want to catch a cab to the airport, FLY across the world, and trek to your home and shmoosh it with my shoe. Then burn my shoe. how can you be at work knowing that monstrosity is in your home wriggling around in a jar? Gosh, I hope it’s dead when you get home. I HOPE IT’S DEAD!!!

    By the way, Dad Unit totally made me laugh. And grossed me out at the same time 😉

  5. Ick. OK so it was alive when I got home. Still alive, and ACTIVE. Happy even.

    So I made myself grow as a human being by setting it free into the landlords padock WELL away from the house.

    Then I went and scrubbed myself free of spider cooties with bleach!!

  6. OH yuck!!! I can’t say that I blame Batz for keeping his distance! I can’t believe you just went off and left it there and went to work.

    I hope it was there when you got home, otherwise… no telling where it is…

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