House! That I own. Because I’m a home owner you guys!

Who here feels like a photo essay? Me? Awesome, I’m the most important anyway.

For todays excellent photo essay I wandered around my newly cleaned house (why yes my Mum is coming to visit, how did you know?!) And took photos. Hence the whole… you know…. photo thing. Good. Are we good? Yes? Excellent.

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This is my kitchen, its kind of badly laid out, because cooking in it is a total pain. Right now I cant have a range hood above my stove, and so I set off my fire alarm a lot. Which has nothing to do with the fact I burn things all the time. (Shut up.) Also I’m pretty sure that stove-oven thing hates me. And theres no fan. I think the kitchen would look amazeballs with big dark tiles, and a dramatic black splashback.

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Oh look! More kitchen! More as in ‘oh my god I have so much space.’ The pantry is big enough to hide a cat in. Which happens frequently, because Batz lives to divebomb off shelves onto my feet. Usually I’m so busy trying to restart my own heart that I forget to send him to time out.

Im not sure what to do with this area. I sort of wanted an art drafting table… but I might have to go all traditional and put a dining room table here. Which can totally multi task, so why am I even bothered by it? I dunno. Possibly I dont want to have to go buy one of those yet, because it’ll need to not make the room feel cramped and dark and annoying. I’ll put it at the end of the 12 month plan.

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While we’re on the kitchen? I cleaned my fishtank last night, because it was dirty enough that I was starting to wonder if there was still fish in there. True to form I dropped it, smashing one of the plastic divides that keep the normal well adjusted fish away from Mac the Serial Killer Paradise Fish, and cutting my hand on the plastic bit.

After sitting in a puddle of fish poop water and contemplating the decisions that had lead me to this point in my life (or trying to get the courage to look at my hand, which I was pretty sure I’d cut off) (I hadn’t. Its more of a scratch than anything.) I investigated my fishtank and the glass on the corner is cracked… but I’m pretty sure its still watertight.

While we’re at this point in the photo essay: why the hell are fishtanks even made of glass anyway? Why arent they plastic and bullet proof?

I ended up having to organise all my electrical cords and stuff anyway though, just in case its not as watertight as I hope it is, so now theyre all off the counter, and tidy, and guys? I’m not going to lie, 11pm at night is not the optimal time to drop a fishtank, cut your hand, and then problemsolve
a. Not  electrocuting yourself,
b. Still cleaning the filthy tank
c. Not killing the stupid tropical fish who need a heater and stuff
d. Cleaning fishpoop water out of a cut without looking at it because: ew.

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Moving right along. That over there is my lounge. One day it will be a sort of a warm dark grey, with timber blinds and there will be french doors to a deck. One day I’ll bother with getting the TV hooked up with the aerial. There’ll be carpet. Or a big area rug. And new couches… which I’ve been threatening to buy since 2012.

All of that is going to wait though, because for now its going to be Archers new den. Having to decide where the little man goes while I’m at work for the first few months was freaking hard, because naturally what I want is: with me! I do not work for a progressive kind of a ‘bring your dog to work’ kind of an IT company. Its not even a progressive ‘Your floor has a lunch area, no holes in the roof, and air conditioning that works properly’ kind of an IT company.

Le sigh. I’ll bet google has a puppy play area.

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This is my guest room. And office. Guestoffice. Studio? I could set it up for painting. The morning sun is awesome.

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And it has a closet. My room doesn’t… and those handles were a D(ad) IY project. The handles WERE flowery rose handles, like the rest of the ones in the house. I have no idea why someone would walk into a hardware store and choose to purchase hundreds of dollars worth of flowery pink door handles.

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Hallway! With puppy buffet. I have to remember to do something about that.

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Isnt the hallway wallpaper to die for? Im going to leave it there for a while. (Have you ever tried stripping 50 year old wallpaper? No? It will drive you to madness with stops along the way for ruined nails, divorce, TheCrazy, and sobbing in the corner rocking. The wallpaper stays. I love it. Sort of.)

The horse head was a bargin buy, and looks like its been crochet!  He accessorises too. Before I got coat hooks he could often be found wearing scarves. Sometimes he sports a hat, he looks good in sunglasses, and right now he’s wearing genuine mouse ears from disney land that Louise brought me.

Louise is travelling the world with Kris right now, and it makes me sad, because I keep going to text her about the cafe we found that does a cheese of the day, and about a movie we should go see, and then I remember shes somewhere in asia probably on a beach with some sort of a coconut themed cocktail.

Bitch.

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This is my bedroom. In the corner I hang all my jewelery on branches that came off my trees when I did a bit of a winter prune and tidy up. My key decorating idea for this room is Fairytale Luxe – like old world fairytale, like an 1900s leather book with gold gilt embossed pages. like an Arthur Rackham illustration. I’m going dark solid wood, antiques golds, bronzes and silvers and probably this dark dreamy colour on the walls:

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Its called Wentworth, from Dulux. I’ve always wanted a dark night sky coloured bedroom. Having been plagued with difficulty setting a sleep schedule and sticking to it when I was at my worst with depression, I thimk its really important that my bedroom is for sleep and sleep only. Theres no tv, no radio, I removed my bookshelf and put it elsewhere in the house. This is a room designed for sleep and good dreams.

I brought a new bed when I moved, and it feels like sleeping on a freaking cloud made of innersprung mattresses. I buy new linen or pillows every 6 months or so, and have this amazing lavender linen spray… and it all feels very luxurious, which makes me happy.

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And in that corner? I might put a wardrobe. Maybe. Or Ill just do my washing and call it done. Bazinga!

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4 thoughts on “House! That I own. Because I’m a home owner you guys!

  1. Love it. Leave some projects for me. I’ve finished (nearly) with the internals with this house, and need some jobs!

  2. Feel free to send your DadIY my way if he’s that desperate for someone to do jobs for!

    I love your place. I love your blog. I loved your story about the fishtank (but I gotta know, if the divide is smashed, what’s keeping Mac The Serial Killer under control? Is it Fish Texas Massacre?)

    I loooove your branches for your jewelry (as in tempted to plagiarise it love it), loooove your unicorn, and am delighted that your sole photo of Batz reveals his devilish soul with those green glowing eyes. I can’t wait to see updates as you DadIY it and paint it!

  3. It’s a lovely house! Congratulations again.

    Now if you’ll just center that mirror in your bedroom over the bureau that my ocd/type A personality IMMEDIATELY noticed was off center, it’ll be even lovelier. 😉

  4. Haha, thanks… You can’t tell in this photo, but the mirror is also tilting ever so slightly to the left… and I’m totally not going to straighten it up. (That’s going to drive you nuts for days I’ll bet!!)

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